So many times things happen, and no one knows the thoughts that go through your head. Well, we like to think that but God knows, and even if it would never be appropriate to say "I'm sorry" to the person that is the object of that thought - God knows our hearts.
As I was driving home, I thought of the people I needed to ask for forgiveness, people who may not even know that I have been offended at them, and yet the conviction was so overwhelming that here I am posting it for everyone to read. There is this song "These are the words I would say". Well, these are the words I would say to those persons that I have wronged, yet held as offense against me.
1. I am so sorry if my words hurt you, or caused you fallout when I left. I never meant to hurt you. I was upset by your actions, but I forgive you, and I pray that God will continue to bless you and increase your ministry.
2. I am sorry that I expect you to take on a responsibility that you can not, to be someone that you can not be. I am sorry that I have held that against you. I pray that God will help you overcome and be reconciled.
3. I am sorry for being judgemental of your actions. I do not know what you are thinking or why you make the decisions you do, but it is not my place to judge. I am sorry. I pray that God will give you wisdom and guidance.
4. I am sorry for holding past hurts against you. I thought I wasn't, but I guess I have. I release you from not being perfect. I release you from the mistakes that have been made. I am sorry I let that come between us. I pray God will help you become the person He created you to be.
5. I am sorry I get cranky with you. I can not imagine what you must be feeling, when I try to I remember I have compassion, but I am sorry that I have more compassion and empathy for strangers. I pray for patience (just not too quick - cause it is a painful process).
6. I am sorry that I put other things before our relationship. I am out of balance in a number of relationships, and I want to do better. I think sometimes it is easier for me to focus on other things, because then I don't have to see the mistakes I make, my faults, my failures. I promise to keep working on this with the grace of God. I pray that you will know how important you are to me.
I am sure that there are other things I need to apologize for, but for now these are the things God has laid on my heart.