You lead me

I woke Saturday morning still thinking about the prompt from #fmfparty yesterday "still."  This verse came to mind, and then my mind started turning.

Psalms 23:2 NKJV He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters.

I am very much someone who likes to stay busy.  In the name of productivity, I could start my day at 6 am and go until 1:00 am.  Well, I used to do that day in and day out.  For fifteen years I was on call 24/7, 356 days a year.  I didn't realize that I was tired.  I didn't realize that I had forgotten how to be still.  I mean, I was a girl with a mission, a God given passion, I must complete.  In the midst of working on my mission, there were times that it was only I trying to complete it.  I had forgotten the most important part of my mission, God.  We can not leave God on the sidelines of His work.

In May, I was fired from my job.  It was a shock to my system.  For the second time only, since I was fourteen years old, I was not working.  And this time around I wasn't in school either.  I did not know what to do with myself.  My second day "off" it really hit me.  I joined the pity party wagon, and started to allow the things spoken over me to take root. I didn't really get out of bed that day. God took all the tasks away from this task oriented person. 

The next day God woke me up to the purpose of this time.   I started getting a fresh perspective.  I was having a Psalms 23:2 moment.  It was time for me to lie down in green pastures.  God was leading me beside the still waters. 

I find it interesting that David said "He makes me". That has never really stuck out to me, but as I have experienced for myself and heard from so many, it is so hard to just relax.  I realized sometimes God really does have to make us slow down and just be in His  presence. God wanted me to lie down, to rest in Him.  God knew how important it would be for me to relax in Him.   He and my family became my only focus, and with the family at work, school and AIT, I had plenty of time for Him.

I admit, those two and a half months felt a lot longer, but at the same time, I miss them.  I miss spending eight hours a day with God.  Listening to messages, reading His Word, praying, listening.  I now enjoy the green pasture times.  Just soaking in all that He has created.  I love me days off now, as I just want to (figuratively) crawl up in my Father's lap and just spend time with Him.

The second part of Psalms 23:2 says "He leads me to the still waters." So many times we are only focused on the storms and having God get us through the tough times.  God also wants to lead us during the still times too. It is easy to turn to God in hard times, or at least it is for me.  It is when I am in routine mode that I tend to go through the motions and do it on my own instead of trusting Him.  When things are just going along, I have a tendency to leave Him at the end of my last problem.  God wants to lead me even when things are still. It is a much easier journey to the still waters,  it is there that if I will allow Him to lead me that my soul can be refreshed.  It is at the still waters that I can drink and be refreshed by the living waters.

The very next line of that scripture passage is "He restores my soul."  If I am not taking time to lie down in green pastures and be led to the still waters, my soul can not be restored.  My soul needs to be restored often.  Helping people can be draining, because I am not meant to do it on my own.  I am only to be His tool, it is suppose to be Him working though me that ministers to people.  He can't let the living waters flow from me to help others if I am not restored.  In order to be restored I must lie down and be led to the still waters.

I am thankful that God loves me enough to make me lie down and to lead me, even when I thought all was well.  I am thankful that I can at any time, choose to be in His presence, to draw from Him and to just be with Him.  I am thankful that He cares so much about me that for two and a half months, He solely met my needs, because He was there for me to depend on fully.  

We don't have to wait until we are dry to be restored.  We don't have to wait until we are weary to lie down.  We don't have to be in the storm to be led.  God is there saying "Come."  Sheep don't rest once in a while.  They don't drink once in a while.  It is a daily thing that the Shepard has the sheep lie down in the pastures.  It is a daily thing that they are led to the still waters.  So it should be with us.  We must daily take time to rest and drink from the living waters.  We must daily have our soul restored.